Monthly Archives: May 2014

(GWE Challenge 19 May) Dear Diary

On 19 May, Greg posted a GWE challenge The Voice of the Voiceless. This is my response.


Dear Diary,

This is my first entry, the first of many, I hope. I feel the need to get down in words the pain I feel, every day being mistreated, abused and ignored.

I used to be an elegant chair… no, not just a chair but an armchair! I had pride of place in the lounge, the preferred rest of Mr Smith and the most important of family and guests. Oh, how long ago that was, and how soon they forget! Now I am in the rumpus, I am torn and soiled, lumpen and damp, orphaned of my friends the sofa and the ottoman, and relegated to the corner to cover the stain on the floor.

Now I am the plaything of Timmy and Sue and Rufus; jumped on, eaten on and spilled on. Sue sneaks sweets from the kitchen and eats them from behind the cover of my arms, wiping sticky hands on my back. Timmy jumps on me like a trampoline, and drapes bedsheets from me to play at forts, setting Rufus to guard the door, and when Rufus isn’t a guard he sleeps on me, leaving drool and dog hair everywhere. And when Uncle Toby fell asleep on me after Sunday lunch last, he caused such a smell it was as though the bowels of Beelzebub himself had opened!

I have not felt the touch of the vacuum cleaner in months, and my cushions itch with stickiness. The sun has bleached my shoulder dry, and my feet and legs are damp with mould and god-knows-what hidden and forgotten by the children underneath my valance.

Is this what I get for years of faithful service? Are people that callous and cruel? What have I done to deserve such treatment? Oh! The tribulations of a chair with a soul!

Fear not, dear diary. I shall be back! My masters must be made aware of the crimes they and theirs perpetrate upon me! Farewell for now.


Diary note to self: find out how the hell that melodramatic, malodorous miseryguts of a chair managed to pick up a bloody pen and write in me.


Conversations With My Daughter – Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow

Job-hunting sucks, but that is what I am doing right now. Writing CVs, writing cover letters, chasing recruiters, cold-calling companies… selling myself has never been an easy thing, and it can get a bit depressing, sometimes. So, when I saw Pam and Greg and some of the other GWE crew had moved over here, I couldn’t help but follow them over, even though I hadn’t posted anything on GWE for months.

(I have been writing, however. My eldest daughter, who is now five, and I have been creating silly stories together.)

A-anyway I need something to look forward to, so here I am. And seeing as my page looks really, really bare, I need to post something, quickly. So I have dug up one of my old Conversations With My Daughter pieces.

Mireya was around three when I started writing these. And she’s gonna kill me when she’s old enough to be embarrassed by them, but for now I present you with:

Conversations With My Daughter – Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow.

 “Daddy, can we watch a movie today?”

“We can watch one later on tonight, Reya.”

“Is tonight today, daddy?”


“Is tonight today, daddy?”

“No. It’s tonight.”

“But is it today?”

“It doesn’t work like that, angel. Now it is today, then when it gets dark it is tonight, then after that is tomorrow.”

“But it gets dark today, doesn’t it daddy?”

“Well… later on, yes.”

“So tonight is today then, isn’t it daddy?”

“Umm… I guess I can’t argue with that.”

“Is tomorrow today, daddy?”

“No. Tomorrow is tomorrow. It is after tonight.”

“But tonight is today.”

“Maybe, but tomorrow isn’t.”

“When is tomorrow daddy?”


“Oh. Daddy?”

“Yes, Reya.”

“Is yesterday today?”

“No, yesterday is yesterday.”

“But when is yesterday, daddy.”

“Look Reya, yesterday is what has already happened. Today is now, and tomorrow is what will be happening later.”

“Oh, okay. Like when we watch a movie later on?”


“But we’re watching a movie today, aren’t we daddy?”

“Umm, yes.”

“And today is now, right daddy?”

“Umm, yes.”

“So can we watch a movie now, daddy?”

Sigh.  “Okay then, Reya. You can watch a movie now.”